First, let me tell you why I’m a bad mother.

My usual routine is gym, back home, check my email, shower, dress and start breakfast of some sort for my two younger kids. My son, the 10-year old is very Virgo so he enjoys helping me out and many times will start the breakfast thing for him and his sister. This morning, as I descend the stairs, I get the distinct fragrance of pizza. Sonny boy was making pizza snack rolls for breakfast.

Could be worse, I suppose. But still, I swept the plate out of his hands, and replaced it with a bowl of cereal. As I said, I am a bad mother.

Okay, back to the gym …

I’ve been working out at the local gym for about 6 months now. My usual workout is about 45 minutes long, a mix of aerobics and machines. I usually listen to a book on my hot pink mp3 player (a Creative Zen, not an IPod because … well, just because.) But sometimes I’ll just watch the news either on the flat screen TVs around the room or the individual TVs at the bikes and some of the other equipment.

Now I have to say I find the aerobics portion incredibly boring which is why I try to keep it interesting, breaking up the activity into 10-15 minute increments on different machines. Listening to my book helps pass the time. Watching the news helps, too. But the best way, I’ve discovered, to get the time to pass quickly is to watch infomercials.

Doesn’t matter what they’re selling – better skin, better body, better cleaning, or whatever … it all works. The mix of copy, imagery, the seduction of the offer makes my 15 minutes whiz right by. I don’t necessarily have to be the market for the stuff being sold either. I’m just happy to let the visual package unfold and wash over me. I don’t even have to think about it much. I just passively receive the message. Before I know it, my beeper tells me I’m done and I can get the hell out and start my day.

Reminds me a little of the days when I was pregnant with my eldest daughter. Every Saturday afternoon -naptime! – I’d look for that PBS painter guy, Bob with the 70s’ disco hair, whose voice was so soothing that 3 three minutes into “Let’s put some happy little trees here … brush tap, brush tap, brush tap” I’d be sound asleep. Better than Nyquil and Benedryl combined.

My world is direct mail and web so I’m not an expert at the craft and construction of DRTV. But I’m wondering if anyone has done a study of time perception with DRTV vis a vis other commercial media. (If you know of any, let me know.)

In any case, I’m grateful to the entire industry for making my 45 minutes in the gym feel like 20. I really am.

• Enjoyed this post? Get free updates by email or RSS
• Need a copy critique or a consult? Contact the Maven
• The ultimate guide to writing and designing effective landing pages – Marketing Sherpa’s Landing Page Handbook, 2008 (aff)